Ten bad dates with De Niro

A Book of Alternative Movie Lists

Edited by Richard T. Kelly Illustrated by Andrew Rae

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Ten bad dates with De Niro by Richard T. Kelly

Richard T. Kelly

About the Editor

Richard T. Kelly was born in 1970 and started composing lists around the age of 9

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Sunday, 4 November 2007

Sean Penn, Hair Actor

posted @2:23 p.m. by Richard Kelly

I note in today's Observer a fine interview with actor/director Sean Penn by Sean O'Hagan, in which your host is generously quoted, as a consequence of one of his other life-functions as Mr Penn's authorised biographer. Since the book in question Sean Penn: His Life and Times is 500+ pages, I've tended to fight shy of Penn-related lists. But hell, it's Sunday, a slooow day, and I just find myself put in mind of Susan Sarandon's characterisation (echoed by Sean himself on certain droll occasions) of Penn as 'a hair actor'. Cue a list of the best Penn barnets on film, one that extends the general follicle fixation of Ten Bad Dates...

TEN BEST SEAN PENN BARNETS ON CELLULOID

#10 As Spicoli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)
Blonde surfer locks: would be higher, if it wasn't a wig.
#9 As Glendon Wasey in Shanghai Surprise (1986)
Greasy, shoulder-length shyster's look for the first reel of the picture: not everyone stayed to see more...
#8 As Jim in We’re No Angels (1989)
Angelic blonde bangs for a sweetly naive convict-turned-priest.
#7 As Mick O’Brien in Bad Boys (1983)
Wolfish, near purplish-dark bangs for a reform school kid.
#6 As Dillard in Crackers (1984)
The San Francisco Mission District rockabilly look.
#5 As Sam Dawson in I Am Sam (2001)
Short back 'n' sides and near vertical on top, rivalling Eraserhead.
#4 As Daulton Lee in The Falcon and the Snowman (1985)
Another rank mop in need of a good shampoo, offset by coked-out shades and moustache.
#3 As Brad Whitewood Jr. in At Close Range (1986)
A blonde peroxide shampoo and set for a teenage tractor thief.
#2 As Matthew Poncelet in Dead Man Walking (1995)
A pompadour of such towering splendour, only a convict could lavish the needful time on it.
#1 As Dave Kleinfeld in Carlito’s Way (1993)
Yes, folks, the reddish frizz flanking a bald crown really is what was left of Sean's own hair once he had worked on it, so condemning himself to 4 months of wearing a hat round New York City...

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